Tangelos

This is quite possibly the most delicious fruit in the land. At least the one I had yesterday was.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tangelo

Stars!

To describe something to someone else is one of the key interactions of humanity, and the basis of communication. To quickly do so with a "star rating" may simplify the critical experience, but enables more communication and an ability to compare and contrast.

Now, as a Hurd14er, I can communicate with those about me by using my superior intellect. For example, if Smoov were to ask me, "How was that movie last night?" I wouldn't even need to respond verbally. One look, a simple facial movement or grunt, and he would understand immediately my thoughts and opinion.

But many readers don't have this level of understanding or cognition. So for their pleasure, I am going to review my weekend in star form

Dinner Friday night at Fattoush

2.5 stars out of five,

Decent Middle Eastern food, but docked for two reasons. First they had no Lamb schwarma, which would be like a Mexican restaurant not having tacos. Second the vegitarian deals were basically giant portions of dips, like hummus, baba gannoosh, etc.

State bar Friday night

0 stars. Why would I wait in line for any place in Chicago in february?

Kelley's Pub

3 stars. Totally average Chicago Irish pub with decent beer selection. They did have TVs at each table and the Celtics game was on! Bonus!

Team Fortress 2 on Saturday and Sunday

4 stars. This is one of the greatest video games ever made. Its ruin-you-life good. I would say that my sessions this weekend were ok, on the one hand, I set my record for headshots in one round! Good job me! On the other hand all the time I spent playing this game was time I could have been spending doing something involved with food or sex. That docks me.

Wingfest

3.5 stars. As low a rating as possible for an all you can eat wing extravagannza. I had to wait outside for half an hour, answering my question from before. It was overpriced. Some of the wings were cold and didnt have a ton of meat. But it was still all you can eat fucking wings. Amazing. I will be attending Wings of the World, the best restaurant I sampled of those there, and hopefully having a higher experience

My poop following wingfest

2 stars. Please refer all questions on Poop star ratings to Smoov.

Lost Season One, episodes 16-22

Im giving this 3.5 stars. I have some problems with the show. Its not the flashbacks or the secrets, it's the writing. The only emotions people are capable of feeling are anger, guilt, and jealousy. Right now my least favorite character is Michael, who always is pissed off at everyone and uses his son as a crutch to get his way or make excuses.

The weather in Chicago

0 stars. Im moving to Brazil. How do you say all you can get wings in Portuguese?

Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction

For some reason today I was thinking about an old TV show called Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction. The premise of the program was to show five different tales of the paranormal and then the viewer could guess which tales actually occurred in real life and which were made up by the writers.

Yes that's right. You could guess which ghost stories were real. From what I watched (And yes, I watched quite a few of these shows) 90% of the stories followed a basic plotline:

1) Person A interacts with Person B.
2) Person A recounts his/her interaction with Person B to Person C, only to be told by Person C that Person B died before their interaction!!!

I did a little googling of Beyond Belief and came across the Jump the Shark page for the show. Apparently 83 people out of 127 think the show never jumped the shark. 11 people think it jumped the shark at "The Crime Solving Horse". I'm curious what sort of standards the producers employed in order to guarantee the authenticity of the accounts. I'm sure they were very, very rigorous due to the fact that had there been any erroneous claims, Beyond Belief would have been roasted in the media.

Ace Detective: Did this horse really solve crimes?
Slack jawed local: Yep.
Ace Detective: C'mon man, I wasn't born yesterday. Gimmie the real scoop.
Slack jawed local: That horse solved crimes. Ain't no foolin.
Ace Detective: If you're a liar, you're a damn good one.

There's some good comments on the message board from Beyond Belief fans too:

"Guys don't rely on Snopes.com for information. They said a place I've been to didn't exist. I mean it's a good website with a ton of stories, but I've basically discovered you can't really believe their 'facts'. Most of the time they get it, but it only takes one miss to become an unreliable source."

They said a place you went to didn't exist??? I will never trust Snopes again! What sort of place was this exactly? Care to give any hint so that I could verify this myself? Or did Snopes immediately take it down after you so methodically dismantled their chain of evidence?

Welcome

How would you feel if you were present at Jesus’ at birth? If you were in the cave with Mohammed when the Archangel Gabriel spoke to him? Sitting next to Newton under the apple tree? Smoking a blunt with RZA and GZA when they came up with the idea of the Wu-Tang Clan?

Since you’ve happened to stumble across this post, consider yourself lucky. You’ve found yourself at one of those moments in history, that will be looked back on as changing the human race and its understanding of itself.

The launching of “The Audacity of Hurd14,” commences our efforts to bring the collective humor, wisdom, and all-around greatness of Hurd14 to the common man. How this will be done shall become apparent to you, the reader over time. In the mean time, listen close and take notes, and soon you may find yourself filled with new feelings of meaning and worth you never knew were possible.

You may ask yourself, “Why haven’t I heard of Hurd14 before?” Because we wanted it that way. While we’ve been planning and brainstorming for almost a decade now, we’ve waited to interact with the public until the time is right. We decided to start with this blog because we thought it was a good way to connect with the common man, to share our ideas, and to hopefully provide some entertainment.

You may also be asking yourself “What is Hurd14? Who are the men and women behind the curtain?” Well that’s for us to know and you to ponder. All will be revealed to you in due time, but for now please feel free to interact with two of Hurd14s charter members, Marmaniac and Smoov. As it becomes necessary, other members will show themselves and shower you with knowledge and humor.

For now, that’s all you need to know. Sit back, relax, and get ready to be amazed.